Our precious little Rylind has arrived! Jennifer was a trooper laboring for 2 days to bring this little guy into the world! We are all so proud and happy and know Ryan and Jen will be wonderful parents!!!
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Monday, March 10, 2008
Wanted.....
My Sister sent me this and I LOVED it so much I have to share it with you!
PARENT:
Job Description
POSITION:
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop
JOB DESCRIPTION:
Long term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills, be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings, weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule, yet be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat, in case this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities! Travel expenses are never reimbursed. Must learn to multitask. This is a permanent position. Teams are encourages to apply, however, sadly, this is not a requirement.
RESPONSIBILITIES:
This is an infinite list. This list will forever, without warning, self adjust to the clients whims Candidates must be willing to adapt to ever-changing and ever-challenging time periods. Basic duties will include maintaining multiple calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must screen phone calls. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, and an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility, laundry, shopping, spare of the moment decision making, field trips, EMT, counselor, teacher, cook, disciplinary provider (often more painful for you than for them), chafer, caterer, must excel at all levels of the aforementioned skills and all the ones we failed to mention.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.
Grand Parent same job except your old and tired. This position is limited to some weekends unless you failed at your previous assignment. Then it is a full time position, because rather than your charges moving out they multiply.
EDUCATION AND PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
There is no amount of reference material that can be studied to prepare you for this job. As each canidents charge will be unique and unpredictable. On-the-job training will be offered on a continually exhausting basis. No previous experience is available.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them
become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and only wish you could do more.
POSITION:
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop
JOB DESCRIPTION:
Long term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills, be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings, weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule, yet be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat, in case this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities! Travel expenses are never reimbursed. Must learn to multitask. This is a permanent position. Teams are encourages to apply, however, sadly, this is not a requirement.
RESPONSIBILITIES:
This is an infinite list. This list will forever, without warning, self adjust to the clients whims Candidates must be willing to adapt to ever-changing and ever-challenging time periods. Basic duties will include maintaining multiple calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must screen phone calls. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, and an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility, laundry, shopping, spare of the moment decision making, field trips, EMT, counselor, teacher, cook, disciplinary provider (often more painful for you than for them), chafer, caterer, must excel at all levels of the aforementioned skills and all the ones we failed to mention.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.
Grand Parent same job except your old and tired. This position is limited to some weekends unless you failed at your previous assignment. Then it is a full time position, because rather than your charges moving out they multiply.
EDUCATION AND PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
There is no amount of reference material that can be studied to prepare you for this job. As each canidents charge will be unique and unpredictable. On-the-job training will be offered on a continually exhausting basis. No previous experience is available.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them
become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and only wish you could do more.
**FOOTNOTE “THERE IS NO RETIREMENT -- EVER
BENEFITS:
No health or dental insurance, No pension, No tuition reimbursement, No paid holidays and No stock options There are no guarentees.
This job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love, and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Vroooom Vroooom....
I have always known Home Depot had workshops but I had NO idea they were this COOL!!!
Connor had such a GREAT time!Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Do I Make You Proud.....
We are planning a Talent Night for Activity Days at the end of March so I made this video to show to the parents of all the girls!
Yes this is being posted at 3 AM!!
Kerrianne I know you can appreciate the late hour!
Yes this is being posted at 3 AM!!
Kerrianne I know you can appreciate the late hour!
Monday, February 18, 2008
Four legged family members...
Awww you look tired...can I get you anything? An extra pillow perhaps?
This is Gabby, she thinks she is the queen!
This is Gabby, she thinks she is the queen!
Do you think these pooches are a bit spoiled?Please take my poll to the right! I would be interested to know if I'm the only person to allow my dogs the run of the house.
My new eyes...
Some of you may have noticed I changed my profile picture....I got some spiffy new specs and I want to show 'em off!My eyelashes hit the lenses of my old glasses....so I went 2 years without wearing eye makeup!!
WOW it's amazing what some mascara can do!
Friday, February 15, 2008
Valentine....
Our ward had a fun family Valentine Dance tonight. I thought I would give you just a sneak peek at one photo I took......more to come tomorrow.
I don't even recognize this handsome little guy!!!
Where did my baby go?
I don't even recognize this handsome little guy!!!Where did my baby go?
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Fine tuning....
For those of you who have seen the video I made for Connor.....I did some fine tuning so it is a little different. I would invite you to check it out again. Thank you for your patients as I learn this new craft of video making.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
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